MY BURDEN

My burden that I bear is something my friends don't see or know of. Not because I wish it to be so, but because they don't want to know about it. I don't know the reason why they don't ask me about my problems, but it's perfectly fine with me.

I finally realised I was made to take in other people's garbage. It took me a while to understand that and now it will take me a while to accept that.
Five or seven years ago I helped a friend who wanted to get clean of drugs. He even told everyone I was his girlfriend. I didn't mind as long as it worked for him. There were some feelings between us but the focus was always on fighting for him, even though it got worn out and gloomy, because the burden was often too heavy. He was walking around with his own personal cloud of rain. It goes without saying that this cloud poured rain on me too. I didn't mind that either.
Eventually, he managed to stay away from Belgrade and consequently the drugs. He is alright now living in another place. But quite recently we had a fallout over politics. How stupid of us. After so many years we managed to glue the chips and cracks on our friendship. But the cup, obviously, cannot be glued back and be in the shape as it was before.
Am I sad about it? Yes for a while I was. Now, I am not sad because I have never regretted a single second I spent with him and because he stayed away from the drugs during that time.

I think, the more you give love the more you receive back, not necessarily from those you expect should reciprocate. Love multiplies by being given away. I can vouchsafe for that.

Help your friend in need the best you can, so that you can forget about yourself.