The Meaning of Despair

“Keep your mind in hell and despair not”

He who is already dead is capable of living, truly. Be dead to everything. Easier said than done.

 It is better not to expect anything good and be surprised when it does happen. In that way we live in peace. Desires make us weak by tempting us each day, by crumbing its way into our minds and hearts. We are dead if we indulge them, we are dead if we renounce them. The tragedy is we cannot renounce them ever, not on our own at least.

The precipice of despair is steep and enticing. What makes some stay on its razor edge is the lack of knowledge what’s at its bottom, if there is a bottom at all, or precisely the knowledge of what is. The depths are unfathomable for sure and maybe it is better not to look down and not to know, but to look up at the stars. That’s how you see life and perceive the joy of life. Through despair. I am blind to the joy and happiness but I know they are there. 

I am in despair and I put the cattle on. That’s how I deal with it. You can drink, eat and sleep all you want or be vulgar and indulge in any gruesome awful crime but you will get no relief. There is no relief from the voices in your head telling you to end it all.

But you don’t listen to them because they are just voices and they will finally go away. That is the meaning of despair - just let it be and it will go away. It is a tool and nothing more.