ANDANTE CON MOTO

                                                 How to find yourself?

First, you have to realize you have lost yourself. I guess it begins there, with that realization. I think I am too busy right now to find myself. I am here where I am and that is enough for now. Unless I went or am going somewhere without my realizing it.

I think I have lost someone vital to my existence. Simultaneous action of putting his phone to charge and the feeling of missing him. The simultaneousness hurts. 

I lost a part of myself. I am still not sure how large a portion of me is gone. Maybe I am a coward for fearing to face that anger. I can say for sure that there is a hole somewhere in me. I cannot say whether it is black or white. Made of dark or white. Matter or what? It really does not matter.

Everything seems bland or monochrome, honestly. Everything seems colorless.  The birds lost their enchanting voices to me. The flowers are simply ok. Everything reminds me of the fact that life is transient and how painful that is. whereas, it is not painful at all. Why cling to stuff, people, or a bird`s song? Clinging is another word for numb.

I realize that the pain of clinging is nothing compared to parting with the loved one. Anyway, I just cling to the fact that if we are a part of a bigger puzzle or different spins of the same photon then I am sure we are still connected. Matter is transient but light is eternal.